Revised
Something Better Emerges from the Past
Introduction
A few years ago I changed convertibles and, with it, my personalized license plates. Previously, my license was DRMAC’S, but I got different plates, for the next phase of life. The new plates were (and still are) DRMAC-R. I have enjoyed the speculation of others regarding what my plates “mean.” My favorite interpretation, from a theater friend, was “Drama-Car.” Some people just thought I had deleted the letters of my last name, i.e., Dr. Mac----r. When I got the plates, I simply meant the R to stand for “Revised.”
I actually love the letter “R” and have, over the years, thought of the “R” in my plates to mean many things. In that spirit I have decided to launch a series of newsletters, the “R-series.” Welcome to the first issue where I explore how revisions can bring something better from the past.
A Minute of Motivation
How are You?
When someone asks you how you are, what do you say? Many people say, “Just fine” or “Not too bad.” What are some other common answers? “Hangin’ in there.” “Okay.” “Alright.” And “Busy.”
The way you answer when someone asks how you are may seem trivial, but it can be very important. How you tell others how you are feeling can affect how you actually feel. When you say you’re “not too bad,” that helps you to feel “not too bad.”
If how you say you’re feeling can affect how you actually feel, then try saying you’re doing “Good,” “Great,” “Wonderful,” “Fantastic,” “Excellent,” or even “Terrific.” When you hear yourself say you’re doing “Great,” it will help you actually feel great. Say you’re feeling “great” every time you’re asked how you are, and you will feel better. If you can’t manage such an enthusiastic response, then at least reply, “Improving” or “Getting better,” and predict an improved future.
So, I’m doing “Great!” How are you?
Note. Written in 1992; re-published here because of how a simple reply can bring a better revision of yourself, bit by bit. This idea, not originally mine, was inspired by Zig Ziglar.
Enjoy Life More
Regeneration
I’m a big science fiction fan and loved “Doctor Who” for decades. This clever series has a way of revitalizing its cast by replacing the main character with another actor through a process of “regeneration.” The main character, “Doctor Who” will transform into another version, still the same person, but with a different appearance and slightly different personality quirks. Fans of the series will have their “favorite doctor” from the more than a dozen iterations of the original.
Each regeneration involves an intense amount of energy and releases that energy through the change process. I’m going through something like that right now, having left the college of education and moved to psychology, which is part of a different college. People who have known me for a long time call it “going back to psychology” because I had a season there once-upon-a-time. Some have said I’ve “gone full circle,” returning to where I started. I agreed at first but have shifted to thinking of this as a “book-end” experience. I started at this university with psychology and I will end my time at this university in the same. The part in the middle was the college of education.
I made this move reluctantly, having become pretty comfortable after 23 years in the same college. More change – Ugh! I’ve had so much professional change in the past few years, how did I have the energy for more?!?
The lovely surprise is that this regeneration is energizing, not draining. The shift is exciting to me as I acquire new colleagues and a new work space. Like Doctor Who in my favorite sci-fi series, I am regenerating. This revision will bring forth a version of me that is different and yet essentially the same. Better.
Dr. Mac – Regenerated.
To enjoy life more, embrace the seasons of life that require a revised version of you. Think of it as regeneration and enjoy the energizing process of bringing forth a better version of you from the history of you.
Faith Corner
“Like a father to his children, God revises those He loves.” (See Proverbs 3:12)
I took some liberty with the Hebrew word used in this verse. The most direct translation from the original is “corrects” rather than “revises.” Either word brings the meaning of something needing to be changed from its current state. The context for the passage is about the wisdom of discipline. A better version of behavior emerges from the past, brought forth by the actions of God or a parent.
“I’m fine just the way I am.” This common assertion resists changes brought from relationships with others. “Don’t try to change me!”
Advice to those who get married is to not try to change your spouse. The reality is that marriage does change people. Ideally, the revisions brought forth by marriage are motivated by love, and the revising spouse respects the essential core of their revised spouse. “I love you just the way you are” is a beautiful sentiment, but love elicits personal growth. Love can make people better versions of themselves.
God’s love brings out the better versions of His children. Being in a relationship with Him is to know His ongoing efforts to revise the ones He loves. We might resist it, insisting we don’t need to change. But love brings forth revisions in people. Still the same people, love makes us better than we were.
Dear Lord, thank You for wanting to revise me into a better version. Forgive me for resisting Your efforts to change me, especially through the people You have brought into my life to love me. Help me to be a revising force of love for the people in my life, as I also surrender to Your loving revision through others. Amen.
Poetry Pause
The R in Me
My official name ends in R.
The postlude of who I am.
Renegade.
Resolute.
Radiant.
Reliable.
Relentless.
Rock-loving.
Redeemed.
Remaining who I’ve always been.
While continuously Revising.
By Cindy MacGregor, August 17, 2023.
Note. I could go on and on with “R” words. These are just a few of my favorites.
Old Mom to Young Mom
The Parent’s Job of Revising
Every human being has a unique personality written into their blueprint. As a newborn develops, their personality emerges. Watching the unfolding of each of my grandchildren has been like watching a treasure chest be unpacked bit by bit.
With the unpacking of the child’s personality comes the natural emergence of misbehavior. No parent has ever reported the need to teach a child how to behave badly. What each child needs to be taught is how to behave as an effective member of civilization. That means things like not biting or hitting anyone.
My oldest daughter is a natural-born leader. She can take charge of a hundred or more middle school children and bring forth beautiful concerts and amazing musicals. It is a wonder to behold!
But she didn’t start out that way. At a parent conference during her elementary school years her teacher reported a problem with my daughter being “too bossy.” I replied, “Don’t you mean her leadership skills need development?” My job wasn’t to change her from not being bossy; my job was to help revise her inborn leadership so it was useful and not problematic. She’s still bossy, but in effective ways.
As an old mom to young parents I encourage you to think of your children as needing revising, not changing. Effective parents work with their child’s natural aptitudes and polish off the rough parts. Michelangelo was famous for his statue of David. When asked about how he created it, he reportedly said, “you just chip away everything that doesn’t look like David.” The masterpiece of each of your children is already inside of them; just revise the parts that don’t belong there.
Dear Dr. Mac
Dear Readers:
You can find my first 64 newsletters, organized into themes, at Reflective Adventures and all my previous posts at ARCHIVE. In the archive you can reorganize the previous newsletters by clicking on “New” or “Top.”
Want to share you thoughts with me? You can leave a comment (see box below) or you can email me at: drcjmacgregor@outlook.com; I will respond to your email, and post our dialogue in a future newsletter (with your permission, of course). I love to hear from you!