Turbulence
Navigating through Life's Bumpy Air
Introduction
Professionally, I am in a turbulent season of my life. The ride feels pretty bumpy these days. Reflecting on my life, there have been many turbulent times. In this edition of Adventure of Reflection, I invite you to ponder life’s “bumpy air” and navigating through it.
Please note that I have an audio file available; this is my first attempt to attach a recording for those who wish to have the newsletter read to them. I hope it works!
A Minute of Motivation
Think Long Term
There is a terrible malady afflicting many of us – “microwave thinking” – the expectation that not only food, but everything in life, should be fast and easy to obtain. If the going gets rough it may seem something is wrong. Isn’t life supposed to be easier?
There is an easy road in life. Whenever you feel uncomfortable you could ignore it and do something that feels good. But where does the easy road lead?
The easy road is easy because it goes downhill, and it’s always easier to go downhill. The farther downhill you roll, however, the more difficult life will become.
The better road in life is the one going uphill. This road leads to the better things in life, like meaningful work, stronger relationships, and peace of mind. This road, however, requires work and patience. The better road is the harder road.
When faced with an uncomfortable situation, two options exist. One, is the path of escape, going downhill towards a life filled with more problems. Second, is the path of courage, facing up to the challenge, struggling through it, crawling and scratching if necessary, as you move uphill towards a life that becomes better and, ironically, easier.
Life is hard and it hurts. Do you want the pain and difficulty of a life rolling downhill, or the growing pain of a life going uphill?
The choice is yours.
Enjoy Life More
Trust the Pilot
I have experienced turbulence while on a plane many times. The voice of the pilot typically warns the passengers, saying something like, “we’re going to go through a little turbulence.” One time a pilot described the turbulence as “bumpy air.”
I like thinking of turbulence as “bumpy air” – it reminds me of the many bumpy roads I have known in my travels. I grew up on a farm, accessed via gravel roads and a gravel lane. The only way to get to the paved roads was by first driving on the bumpy ones. Similarly, the only way to get home is to take the paved roads until you get to the bumpy ones, and the bumpy path means home is near.
From flying I have noticed turbulence is most often during the initial departure as the plane climbs in altitude away from the airport, or during the descent as the plane moves closer to landing. Typically, a pilot is able to find “smooth air” during the in-between portion while flying at high altitude.
I have been thinking about how life is often like that. Things feel rough when we are moving away from a familiar season of life, with the turbulence of grief. Life also feels unsettled when we are moving into a new stage of life, with the turbulence of fear.
I don’t mind turbulence while flying. It’s usually normal; I trust the pilot to get the plane, and me, safely through.
Turbulence in life is also normal. Relax, sit back, and trust the pilot. Soon you will either be flying in “smoother air” or you will arrive at your “final destination.”
Faith Corner
Jesus, after calming the storm, said, “Where is your faith?” (see John 8: 24-25 for context)
Turbulence during flying didn’t happen in Biblical times. In Jesus’ time, a storm arising while sailing was a common experience for people. Such storms could rock the boat violently, putting those inside at great peril of drowning.
The writer of the book of John describes a time when such a storm arose while the disciples were crossing a sea with Jesus in the boat. In the many messages I have heard about this event the emphasis is usually on how Jesus tells the storm to be still. That IS pretty amazing and important.
I, however, draw your attention to the follow-up question from Jesus, “Where is your faith?”
Was their faith in the strength of the boat? Was their faith in their sailing abilities? If so, they had reason to be afraid. A turbulent storm could destroy the boat and surpass their abilities to sail through it.
The disciples, often viewed as weak in faith, did the right thing: They cried out to Jesus for help. Was Jesus’ question about the source of their faith a chastisement? Perhaps not.
Are you in the midst of a turbulence? If so, hear Jesus asking you, “Where is your faith?” Cry out to Him for help. He may calm the storm or He may help you sail your “boat” through it.
Jesus, I am feeling unsettled and frightened about some circumstances in my life. I confess to putting my faith in my own strength or abilities, when you are ready to help. Please help me put my trust in You to navigate me through these turbulent times. Thank You for being in my boat. Amen.
Poetry Pause
Unsettled
Everything
Everywhere
Feels broken.
Nothing
Anywhere
Feels normal.
People speak of
A “new normal” –
A contradiction.
Something new
Cannot be normal.
Familiar
And ordinary
Are normal:
Comfortable.
New
And unfamiliar
Are not normal:
Uncomfortable.
Everything
Everywhere
Except You.
You are
The Same.
You are
Not Broken.
You are
Familiar.
You are
Comfortable.
Only in You.
Hide me in You.
Settled.
By Cindy MacGregor, June 27, 2020
Note. The date on the poem reveals a search for true safety in the midst of tumult. I learned much about coping with turbulence because of the disruption brought by COVID.
Old Mom to Young Mom
Loving Turbulent Tots and Teens
Raising children is a daily, seemingly unending, challenge. There are two seasons of parenting that are more challenging: Tots and Teens.
The first season, often called “the terrible twos” is a turbulent time in which the child, discovering the power to oppose the parent’s will, practices that opposition. The child’s refusal to cooperate, often insisting on doing the opposite of what the parent wants, can be tough on parents. The tot is leaving the season of totally dependent babyhood, heading into the more autonomous season of childhood.
The second season, the teenage years, is a turbulent time in which the young person pushes against the parents and away from their childhood home. Rebellion against rules and tension in parent-child relationships is a normal passage for a teen. The teen is leaving the season of dependent childhood, heading into a more autonomous season of young adulthood.
These turbulent seasons must come. To eventually become an independent adult, a baby must become a semi-autonomous child, and, later, an even more autonomous adult. Turbulence signals a shift in relationship. And those shifts are normal. A good parent is like a good pilot, staying steady in the cockpit, with the destination of well-adjusted adulthood in sight for their child.
Dear Dr. Mac
I have been through many turbulent seasons as a parent and as a human. If you would like to talk to me, please send an email to: drcjmacgregor@outlook.com; I will respond via email or in this section of a future newsletter, or both. I hope to hear from you!